Mia thinks the enemy is a one trick pony. He’ll come at it from different angles but usually the lie is the same thing it’s just presented differently. Disappointment is a filter that things aren’t going to work out. For Mia it was an area where Mia had not seen God move and wanted it to be a God thing but she was also so disappointed that even if God had done something in her life she probably wouldn’t have acknowledged that it was him anyway. The first thing God did for her was he highlighted something. At a Belonging Co worship night God spoke to her and said, “I want to heal the sickness with no name.” God showed her that she had this disappointment in her heart that had gone down so deep that it was turning into something else. She thinks that disappointment is the cancer of the church, it’s hard to diagnois until it’s like really obvious. One of the things God asked Mia to do before he started working on the work of getting Mia and Joren together was he started to changer her filter from disappointment to hope and disappointment to expectation. 

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Have you ever considered that your desires are God’s desires? She thinks we sometimes have this idea that if it’s this super spirtual thing then God’s very interested but if it’s marriage or babies or like something that’s so self serving then like no he’s not. You know marriage is totally God’s idea?? And God is obsessed with marriage?? God loves it! So don’t you think God loves the idea that he would orchestrate two people to be even more powerful for the kingdom, to be refining to one another, to build something strong, to create legacy, don’t you think God is passionate about that?? 

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Mia then talks about a vision God gave her about a furniture warehouse. She looks up and God the Father is there, she’s looking out at this furniture warehouse and there’s all these one off pieces of custom furniture that have already been made. No two pieces of furniture are the same. She looks up to God and he says to her, “you can pick anything you want.” You are never out of options with God and God is go good about saving things and hiding things and being so intentional about like no you haven’t missed out, you don’t have to pick from the leftovers, that’s just not how God is. So if people are saying these things to you, you may need to remove them from the room. Jesus actually kicked people out of the room who didn’t have faith because that actually affects the atmosphere of what you’re believing for. Back to the vision, Mia starts walking around this furniture warehouse every time she’d see something that she felt like “yess, yes yes, this is it” someone would get to it before her. To be completely honest this was her experience in dating. She remembers walking around and even things she’d feel good about and nobody got to it before her she’d still feel this check in her spirit. Then she’d think, no this just isn’t it. She remembers in the vision going back to God and saying, “God, I don’t really feel like anything in here is for me and unless you’re going to pick with me, I don’t want to do this.” God the Father smiles and he says, “You know Mia, everything here is good, you know I’m the one that made everything here. So there are things here that are better for you than other things. But, if you want me to pick with you, I’ll custom make it for you, because not everyone wants me to custom pick with them and that’s okay, that’s all good. If you want me to pick with you, then I will custom make it for you. But, that means you’re going to be empty handed for a little bit longer because custom made things take a little bit longer. Are you okay with that?” Mia said YES. After that, the vision was over. 

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So from that moment forward, instead of wishful thinking or moving towards nothing she has this promise that she’s holding onto and praying from. As far as what’s wishful thinking and what’s God, it’s incredibly important that you have a conversation with God. God says he knows the plans he has for you and you know he actually wants to let you in on them if you’ll just let go long enough and stop trying to orchestrate it yourself, that you’ll stop and say God how do I partner with you, and what you’re already doing? It’s very important that you have your own relationship with God. Some of you may be like, “I don’t know how to hear God.” To which Mia responds, do you have a Bible? Because there are plenty of promises in the Bible. 

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It’s important to partner with things that keep your hope up. A big part of Mia and Joren’s story is that she looked for evidence. What she means by that is not coping a formula that she’s doing, if you start coping a formula you’ll get a very average version of what God is trying to do because he’s so intentional. He wants you to have your own story. One of the things Mia did as far as looking for evidence is that she was looking for evidence of what God was doing, not what he wasn’t doing. Even when she couldn’t find evidence of what God was doing she’d go back to the promise he had already given her. So she’d go to Sephora and buy really good men’s cologne because she thought it was for someone and she’d save it until he’s here, and now he’s here. 

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Do whatever you can to stay in hope. Do whatever you can to kill disappointment. Do whatever you can to kill frustration. Do whatever it takes to stay in hope. If that means you have to go and collect evidence or do something in the natural that partners with your faith in the spirit. 

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For Mia there was another time where she was at church and she heard God clear as day say, “It’s in the mail.” She thought YES, it’s in the mail. So she went on restoration hardware to see how long custom furniture takes to be delivered and it said 12 weeks. She thought, 12 weeks, Valentines day is in 12 weeks, God’s giving me a husband for Valentines day that’s amazing. Which is so funny, we think we know what God is doing, and he’s always doing something so much better. One of the things she did, is that it got to Valentines Day and no mail turned up so she was like ugh. She went home to her apartment and where the mail boxes are she marched around them 7 times (like Jerico), and then did a little shout at the end. She saw it, and God saw it. She got two messages that night from friends she hadn’t talked to in a while. One said, this is so weird but I had a dream about you getting married last night, and then another friend who said one of the girls on their team had a dream about her getting married. So don’t tell me, that God doesn’t see your act of faith in the natural partnering with the Spirit. After that, 3 months later, Mia gets an email and it says, “You probably don’t remember me, but 2 years ago I saw you at your church and I’ve remembered you ever since. I don’t live in Nashville anymore but I’d love to take you on a date.” And the Holy Spirit goes, “I told you it was in the mail.” 

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God is just as excited as you are about the expectation of stepping into a new season. She wants to break off any kind of inhibition and every kind of feeling of shame or anything like that, that you have to pull back a little bit or pretend like you don’t want to be married or be in a relationship as much as you do. That is a very stupid, nonsense mentality from like 19 year olds who got married who are like, “it’ll happen when you least expect it and just wait on God.” It’s wonderful to stay hopeful, and in expectation. Stop begging God and start praying from a place of it’s already done. 

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Number one, don’t do things you don’t feel peace about. If you feel peace about going on a bunch of dates, do that. If you don’t, don’t.

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Don’t settle. Yes be willing, yes be open but don’t settle. 

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Genuinely like yourself. If you like yourself you wont’ let someone treat you less than you deserve. 

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Women, don’t try to fix somebody. Don’t date someone as a project. Guys don’t like it, and it’s not good for your heart. You shouldn’t have to bait someone for attention. Guys are pretty good at seeing a girl and being like….HER. You don’t have to trick someone or convince someone into liking you. It’ll have peace on it. 

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If it does not have peace on it, stay far away from it. 

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Mia started celebrating things really well. She started going to people’s weddings and was like, what’s the most expensive thing on the list, okay great, I’m buying that as their gift. She started being really good about championing the season that she wanted. God will bring things when nothing is on the horizon. 

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When Mia was alone, God would talk to her about things. A lot of it, was giving her permission to feel sad, permission to feel a bit ripped off. BUT, permission wasn’t like permission for that to be her new identity. Permission was like, “hey, let’s walk this out together and give yourself permission to have a cry and say that really hurt.” When she did, she felt the Holy Spirit right there, closer than ever saying I understand, and what his heart was in it. 

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It also helped her to expect differently, that it wouldn’t happen again. It’s good to process with God, but it’s also good to lay it down. God saying to her, “you’re never ever going to be so disappointed, that I can't go deeper and heal that.” 

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The season she met Joren in was a season she said to her friend that she was more willing than ever to be hurt again. Lots of us aren’t willing to be hurt, but that’s what vulnerability is. 

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Mia remembers being very single and she kept getting these ads on instagram for rings. This was probably like 2 years before she met Joren. This one came up and she was like THAT, that’s the ring that I want. It’s very unique and specific. She screenshoted it because it was such a beautiful ring and one that she would like. She went to the website the next day to look at how much the ring costs, but the ring had sold so she didn’t get to see how much it cost. Oh well, she forgets about it. 

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When Joren and her were getting engaged, she didn’t bait him to propose, they really didn’t even talk about the kind of ring she’d like at all. When Joren proposed, Mia was very shocked. It was such a random time, but then she looks at the ring and it was that ring. It’s a very unique ring. So many people are like, how did he know? Mia doesn’t think he did know, but God did. God wants to give you those little winks from heaven that says, I saw it all. I didn’t miss a thing, and detail for detail I didn’t miss a thing. If  you’re not willing to wait for a story like that, then Mia recommends you go marry the first person you see and make it work. 

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Why would you have the average version of something when you can have the custom? The thing about custom, is that it just fits. Don’t tell me God isn’t detailed, or that he doesn’t want to orchestrate something incredibly kind. God will move in it however much room you’ll give him. 

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There’s so many people listening that believe God can and he will but so many that believe he doesn’t genuinely want to. God wants to. The desires in your heart aren’t silly. The says to lay down your flesh and kill your flesh but it says nothing about laying down and killing your dreams. 

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