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Dating as a Black Man

with

DeAngelo Moss

Heart of Dating is so excited to welcome one of Kait’s best guy friends, DeAngelo Moss to the show! Deangelo is a man on a mission to deliver truth to his generation. Known for his fearless and uncompromising approach to God’s Word, DeAngelo believes that the understanding and practice of biblical principles is key in realizing one’s potential. With a proven ability to inspire and connect with people, his relatable approach to communicating serves him well in his pursuit to help people live their best lives. 

He is here to share his personal experiences as a Black man.

Last week we had a conversation with Kait's dear friend Tiffany McLeain, discussing her experience dating as a Black woman.. We love Tiff so much for her willingness to share. Her vulnerability was just so beautiful and generous. And with that, we also want to say, we know her story is only one part of the pie, and doesn't represent the extent of everyone’s situation or experience. Going into this week's interview with DeAngelo Moss, talking about dating as a Black man, we recognize both conversations are only just the beginning. We are just getting into  the tip of the conversation.

With that we welcome your feedback, thoughts, suggestions, all of it, as we continue to engage in this conversation as a ministry!

How has being a Black man impacted your dating life?

  • Deangelo talks about how he doesn't really date a lot as he’s been focused on his career mostly.
  • He talks about how he hasn’t really thought much about how his race has impacted his dating life or hasn’t noticed it much because he travels a lot.
  • He did say that he travels, he does notice that on his dating apps, he gets more interest when he’s in areas with larger Black communities. 
  • He’s noticed more Black women tend to be more interested in him than other women. 

Since you travel to a variety of churches for work, how have you felt in the white majority communities or churches?

  • Deangelo is typically invited as a guest or speaker to churches, so if the congregation knows that they treat him differently than others, however, if the people do not know that, he tells us that people are a little more hesitant to his presence in the room or church. 
  • “I’ve become accustomed to being treated slightly differently or having to explain myself”
  • I’ve been used to not being welcomed in certain places.
  • Deangelo talks about how he is very aware of how he is seen when he walks into the worm and has developed defense mechanisms over time. 
  • Kait and Deangelo discuss biases and systemic racism and how the small nuisances has impacted our culture and have fed racism.

There are fears in dating interracially or people not willing to date outside their culture/race. Have you experienced that and why do you think that is?

  • Deangelo was transparent and shared his experiences in fearing dating someone outside his race and talks about the hurdles he’d have to face in helping teach that person as well as having to handle maybe difficult family members, etc.
  • Some people are just not willing to be uncomfortable.
  • There are challenges in an interracial relationship which can bring concerns and fears in entering one.
  • Everyone wants to be loved and accepted, that goes for all cultures and backgrounds.
  • Sometimes we look for the path of least resistance and for some that may be avoiding dating outside their culture. 
  • We need to question why we may have an implicit bias and truly look deep in our hearts to question ourselves why we may not be open to dating people of other races, cultures, or backgrounds.

How should we react to what’s going on in the world?

  • Deangelo makes a parallel to the Hunger Games movies/books saying that one district may just not know what's going on in the others.
  • Time to pop our comfortable bubbles and learn more about the Black experience.
  • We just need to have conversations and gain perspective by educating ourselves. 

What is your final nugget of dating advice?

  • If you're hesitant to date someone for some preference, whether it’d be skin color, height, or anything else… dare to date. 
  • Don’t be afraid to get out there and try and fail until you find the right person.

Other Resources:

Follow DeAngelo on Instagram HERE

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